Why It Feels So Hard to Rest (And What That Says About Your Self-Worth)

It’s Friday. Maybe you’ve told yourself you’ll “switch off” this weekend. Maybe you’ve even pencilled in a quiet evening or promised yourself a lie-in.

But when the time comes… guilt creeps in.

Your mind whispers:
“You haven’t done enough.”
“You should be more productive.”
“Other people have it harder.”

And before you know it, what could have been rest turns into another battleground with your inner critic.

If that feels familiar, you’re not broken, you’re human. And more specifically, you’re someone who’s learned to tie their worth to what they do, not who they are.

Why rest feels unsafe

When your self-esteem has been built around achievement, people-pleasing, or keeping it all together, slowing down can feel risky.

Rest isn’t just rest, it’s an invitation for all those uncomfortable feelings you’ve been working so hard to outrun:

• “I’m not enough as I am.”

• “If I stop, people will see the real me.”

• “I’ll fall behind.”

No wonder your nervous system sounds the alarm at the thought of doing nothing.

What changes with healing

Through therapy, I often see the same shift happen: rest becomes safe again.

It’s not about forcing yourself to meditate or putting “self-care” on a to-do list. It’s about gently untangling your worth from your productivity, perfectionism, or performance.

When that happens, rest starts to feel different. Not indulgent. Not lazy. Just… human.

And in that space, something beautiful happens:
✨ You stop running on empty.
✨ You start trusting yourself more.
✨ You realise you were never “too much”, just carrying too much.

If this resonates, maybe your next step this weekend isn’t to cram more in… but to notice what comes up when you pause. And to remind yourself: feeling guilty about resting says more about your self-worth than your to-do list.

You deserve to rest simply because you are human. Full stop.